Massage is a nurturing field of work, and historically, service industries in which caring is the focus have been predominantly occupied by women. Nursing and teaching come to mind right away, but the massage industry has also been heavily populated with female practitioners. One would think that the gender of the therapist is of little significance…and for the most part, this is true.

The Comfort of the Client

Ultimately, its the comfort level of the client and their preconcieved ideas of massage that may influence their decision of one gender of therapist over another.  Women often state they feel more at ease with another woman lest they feel judged about their body. Obviously, this stems more from self-judgement than the reality of a professional who works with many different bodies everyday. Many men fear a male therapist might be gay, and while this could be true, it’s undoubtedly another projection onto a professional. The bottom line is that you are paying for a therapeutic experience based on the skills and abilities of the practitioner. A sensual experience does not mean a sexualized experience, but the stigma that confuses the two continues to this day in the professional world of bodywork. Regardless of any appearance of gender bias, a client needs to feel comfortable with the person with whom they work.

Real Differences

Are there any differences in how male and female therapists work?  To make any comparison based solely on gender would be its own bias and a gross generalization. Most therapists have a ‘signature’ style based in the modalities they have studied, their personalities and their own preferences in receiving bodywork. It’s important to find a therapist whose style and abilities are a good match for what you’re looking for. Personally, I love deep work. I like to feel as many layers of fascia (tissue) as possible including their insertions points into bone. I like to feel stretched and flexed—so I tend to work this way. Those who want deep tissue massage will often seek out male therapists. While a therapist’s height, weight and strength can assist in deeper work, I’ve had excellent deep work by female therapists. Conversely, I have many clients who come to me solely for stress relief or insomnia and such pressure would not be relaxing. A good therapist is an adaptable therapist.

The Experience Behind the Hands

Some practitioners approach the body as a technician and others as an artist. For me, it’s a combination of both. Knowledge of anatomy and physiology provides a foundational road map for the more rhythmic, intuitive expression or movement over the body.  I like to think of it in terms of the the ancient duality of yang/yin, left brain/right brain, and male/female. One is technical, the other intuitive, but together they create the dance that leaves one feeling therapeutically energized. In many ways dance is a very appropriate metaphor to describe the dynamic experience between someone and their massage therapist; no two experiences are exactly alike. Someone who is guarded physically or emotionally will not likely have the same experience as someone who relaxes immediately or falls asleep. A client who practices yoga or sports will most certainly have a different experience with a therapist than someone with fibromyalgia or body dysmorphia.  As professional therapists we are trained to recognize these differences and approach the client accordingly.

When looking for a massage therapist, make your decision based on their experience and how they present themselves. Avoid gender biases unless you feel strongly about it. Trying different practitioners to understand differences can be rewarding in its own way.  Don’t be afraid to communicate your needs and goals. Most importantly, allow yourself to relax and enjoy the wonderful experience human touch can be and how it resonates on so many levels in your being.

Rod Cain, LMT owns and operates Rod Cain Massage Therapy in Burlington, Vermont.